Last Monday night (for Family Home Evening) we had a lesson on anger. We started by talking about emotions, what they are, and why we have them, and the fact that we need to learn to control all of them. We focused in on anger and this scripture:
For verily, verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another (3 Nephi 11: 29).
He stirreth up the hearts to contend with anger. WOW! We used the analogy of mixing up kool-aid to explain this concept. If we were to put a package of purple drink mix with sugar over it and then cover that with water and let it sit, it probably wouldn’t turn the water very purple. However, if we mix, mix, mix, purple will get all through the water. If your feelings of anger are the purple mix, then Satan wants you always to be consumed with purple anger and so, he will mix, and stir, and get you and others really riled up so that all we do is fight!
Then we used the Mr. Roger’s Song, What do You do with the Mad that You Feel to discuss that we need to turn our anger into something constructive. This is how we learn maturity. We have control, that is what it means to be a woman or man. Here is the Sheet Music, and you can see the video of him singing by following this link and clicking on videos, then songs.
Then we talked about the examples of the Savior on the Cross, Father, forgive them for they know not what they do (Luke 23:34), and the Prophet Joseph Smith who was taken out of his home in the middle of the night and tarred and feathered. That night, he crawled home and they worked to clean him up by tearing the tar off of his skin. The next morning, he preached a sermon on love and forgiveness to some of the same people who had mobbed him the night before. Six were converted and baptized as a result of his ability to forgive.
Finally, we made goals for the week of what we would do to control our anger:
- Go on a Run
- Count to ten
- Talk it through
- Do art work
- Spend some time away from each other
- Put the toy (or other item that they are fighting over) in “time-out”
As a follow-up, when the girls have gotten mad this week, I just sing the Mister Rogers song, and then we’ve talked through the situation, rather than yelled and screamed. It’s been a very effective lesson. They’re not all effective of course, but this one seemed to be valuable so far. 🙂
What Do You Do With The Mad That You Feel
|What do you do with the mad that you feel
When you feel so mad you could bite?
When the whole wide world seems oh, so wrong…
And nothing you do seems very right?
What do you do? Do you punch a bag?
It’s great to be able to stop
I can stop when I want to
|What Do You Do with the Mad that You Feel?
By Fred M. Rogers